What They Don't Tell You.......

As I sit with my youngest child whom is 4 yrs old, I wonder why didn't they tell me about how having a child really is going to be? I'm not new at this my oldest will be 20 in a few months. It's just that no one tells you the truth about being a parent. It's not all rainbows smiles and giggles. It's sleepless nights followed by long days of pleading with a small human being who can go all day with a 10 minute power nap. You aren't told how you will be puked on peed on and just be a walking talking tissue. They do tell you "Oh a child will change your life" they just dont say how. Like getting a shower everyday is mostly a fantasy. You wont get to go potty by yourself and your vocabulary will change. People who have children dont tell you the nasty side of parenthood because they had to go into it blind and they want you to share in that soul shaking experience. There are those wonderful moments that you get from your children, which is why you are willing to have more than 1 child. And you want to make sure that there isnt something wrong with your first born.
I honestly think there should be a book or something on true parenthood. All the honest to goodness parts of being a parent. Not a how to change a diaper kind but "I didnt feed you anything that looked or smelled like that" kind.

Have You Seen My Get Up and Go?

It wasnt that long ago I would get up take the kids to school then come home clean up the house. Now it seems to take everything I have to wake up then drag myself to the car and get kids to school. I know cleaning is a chore but it seems even more of a chore than it did just a yr ago. I could whip through the house cleaning it from top to bottom in a few hours. Now it takes me a few hours to clean a room or two. I know you slow down with age, but dang I aint old.
I just need to turn on the radio get my grove going and get to getting.

What Do You Have To Hide?

So far 3 states are going to start drug testing before you can receive government assistance. There are some that think this is wrong that children will be the ones hurt in this action. I believe that its a great idea. Why should tax payers pay for others to get their fix instead taking care of their children? If they fail the drug test then an investigation into the welfare of the children should be started. There are children that are already going without because of their "caregiver" using the assistance for other than its intended purpose.
Only people getting upset with this, as far as I can tell, are those who know they would fail the test. If you are trying to take care of your family doing everything you can, but still need assistance fine. But if you are using your assistance to get your fix then there is a problem.
 Addiction is an illness, I understand that. I  know that it can overtake you, but I also know there are things you can do to overcome addictions. Maybe the threat of having your government assistance being taken away will make these people see the light. That they have a problem and need to get help so they can take care of their families. Who knows maybe if they get off the drugs they could get off assistance.
You never know what you are able to do until you try. Some just need a little push into trying. I say drug test them and give them that push.

5 hours away

Even though you are at least 5 hours away you still made me cry, but in a good way. You helped me remember the feelings from childhood that could destroy a lesser person. I am glad I had you there to make me strong. You helped me remember that we have the most amazing wonderful fabulous caring loving giving, there arent enough words or the exact words to describe our Mom. You are my big brother, Mark Allen Nelson, and I love and thank you......oh and miss you

Not Always Wrong

I know I am not always right, but I also know I'm not always wrong either. I have made mistakes. I need to learn to let some things go but it's really hard. I know my family is never going to be the Cleavers. I would like it a bit closer to the Cleavers rather than the craziness it is. I know I say and do things that hurt I am sorry for that. I have been hurt too. There are times I feel like my only use in this family is to cook clean be a taxi and buy stuff for others. I am a person too. I would love to have help with the cooking and the cleaning. If I got that help without asking screaming or flipping out for it I would be in a better mood. I wouldnt mind so much when asked to drive some where or to buy something.
I dont know what I can do to make things better. I can just hope and pray things work out for the best.

Where Did I Go Wrong?

I gave birth to you. I feed you changed you and dressed you. I raised you to the best of my ability. I dont know why I get treated like I have done you wrong. You have a home food clothes and extra stuff. But thats never enough for you. You always want more, but you arent willing to do anything for any of it. You want to act as if you are the Queen and we are here to serve you. All you have to do is go to school pay attention to your child and pull your head out of your ass.
I dont get a list of things that need done, I just see it needs done and do it. You are old enough to figure out that if its dirty clean it or wash it. If its trash throw it away. Why is it so hard for you to understand? I am over the laziness ungratefulness and rudeness that I get from you. So you can either pull your head out of your ass or find a new address and someone else to buy your shit and run you everywhere.

A&T....."I can take care of that for you" part 2

After 2hours and 48 minutes on the phone with AT&T today I still dont think problem is resolved. They dont want to stand up and say "We messed up". Some how I get the blame for them creating 2 accounts for me only mailing me a bill for one of those accounts. It so bothersome how they treat you. I miss the days where the company would put the customer first instead of their pocket book.
I ended up talking to a total of 8 different people today "customer service", billing, and collections. None smarter than the last. It just amazes me how they act so caring but pretty much are like "Fu*% Off".  When I worked in customer service you went above and beyond to make sure that customer was very happy. You want return customers. I guess being multi million dollar company you really dont have to care if you lose one little account.
Really how hard is it to do your job? And do it correctly. Well if you work for AT&T you dont have to do your job right. You can blame it on another "customer service" person or hell just blame customer.
I hope pray beg and plea that today was my last day talking to AT&T about this.

AT&T....."I can take care of that for you"

I have been told "I can take of that for you" or "Its all straightened out now there wont be any further issues" so many freaking times I could burst. This has got to be the worst company ever! No one knows what they are doing and want to tell me to just calm down. I will calm down when you fix the errors stop taking money out of my account and get people that know what "customer service" really is! In the past week I have talked to them at least 6 times. They tell me I only owe a certain amount I pay said amount. Next thing I know they are taking almost $200 out of my account. I call, which I am on hold with now,they say "I see here there was an auto pay payment made yesterday for $361" WTF!!!!!!!!! I dont have a money tree. This is why I hate auto pay but was told I had to enroll cause of my credit score even though I have had cell service with them for almost 5 yrs! I figure as long as I pay before its due there wont be any problems. Well now I have ran into a whole wasp nest of problems with this company. I guess they dont understand I will cancel my service go back to Comcast wait for my cell contract to be over and say FU to AT&T!
I am on hold with 4th person at AT&T today total time on phone 54 minutes, time talking to a "customer service" person maybe 20 minutes. That includes all 4 that I have been on the phone with today.
Oh lucky me I get a new person to talk to!!!!! Get to explain everything ALL over again!
To be continued....................

The Joys of Talking to AT&T

I so enjoy talking to the people at AT&T they are so helpful. I may have even made friends with a few of the "customer service" people since I talk to them 4-6  times a week. It starts with the automated voice asking me questions which I answer and then it takes me to the wrong department. I get either transfered back to automated voice or told I need to call a different number. In the chance I get to the right department, I get put on hold multiple times for at least 5-20 minutes at a time. I have talked with the "customer service" people so many times about the same things I should just record my voice and play it for them oh but I cant do that because of all the being put on holds I get from them. HHHmmm I know it would be great if they would actually do what they say they are going to and get my account straightened out. Every single "customer service" person I have talked to over the last 3 weeks has told me "I will get this issue straightened out for you. There will be no more issues." I call BULLSHIT!! If they actually did their job in the first place there wouldnt be any issues or have gotten it straightened out on the first call heck even the 20th call would be nice. As I am typing this I have been on the phone with AT&T for 43 minutes, mostly once again on hold. How can they keep customers when they screw up so many things? All the places I have ever worked you messed up this much you were fired. I guess it pays to be a company with millions of customers that way you can screw over quite a few and still stay in business. I never thought I would say I miss Comcast but "I miss Comcast"
I am not trying to get anything for free I just want my bill issues figured out straightened out so I can move on with other things. I am tried of being told "We have everything straightened out for you" I am really tired of hearing the recording of all the offers AT&T has and thank you for being a valued AT&T customer. If I was so valued why am I still on hold, 50 minutes now, and still having the same issues?

Technology GGrrrrrr

I can figure most things out but some technology just is a lil much for me. I have a new laptop and its slow going a figuring out what's what. Its a Mac so its taking me some time to get use to things. I know it does a lot more and I have muddled through. I guess reading the manual would help. I wouldn't want to make things too easy on myself LOL If I get to stuck I will look at the manual or find someone to walk me through it.

time to be a kid again!

There are a million things I could be doing right now. There are floors to sweep and mop, furniture that needs dusting, and on and on. But I figure its not going anywhere. I should take time to slow down and enjoy myself. Watch a movie, I already watched two, sit on the porch, call a friend, or best yet hang out with my 4yr old! I know the world isn't going to come to an end because my shelves are dusty or a few dishes in the sink. So I will get to it when I get to it. I have learned through my 4yr old to take time to smell the roses, she does every time we go to the store, enjoy life and have fun. Just because you are a grown up doesn't mean you cant take a little time to be a kid again! We need to look around us and notice what we have in front of us instead of what we want. So go color a picture or write with chalk on the sidewalk blow bubbles. Just live laugh love mostly enjoy!

Walk a Mile

People love to judge others and hold themselves higher than others. Have you ever walked a mile in their shoes? Do you know what hardships they have overcome or trying to overcome? We find it easier to talk about others than to talk to others. Maybe they just need a helping hand a little guidance. Someone just to listen to them. We are to wrapped up in our own lives to really care about others and what we could do for them. Its easier to put down, make fun of and judge others than it is to say how are you? or a simple hello. How would you feel if you had not one person to turn to when you didn't know what to do? Take a step back and really think about it. Could you walk a mile in their shoes?

What happened to customer service?

How is it I get my bill I pay my bill, but some how there is another bill for the same thing with different account number? The company screws up and the customer pays the price. How is it my fault you don't know your job? If people took the time to pay attention to what they are doing there would be less mistakes. But that's not going to happen because companies want more done by less people in less time. So once again the customer gets screwed. Do they not understand the customer is the one keeping them in business? I don't want anything for free I just want to be treated fairly. I am a person paying for a product that product has a price. The price should remain the same not change whenever the mood strikes. Big companies put out Mom & Pop places so they can be bigger and better. Well most cases they are bigger but definitely not better. I love Mom & Pop stores. They know who you are and treat you with respect. You aren't just another account number.

Chasing my tail

I feel as if I am always chasing my tail. Its an endless cycle of the same BS. I guess it makes me insane thinking things will be different. I hope for a change I pray for a change even a glimmer of a slight change would be nice. Maybe its my fault I let things be too lacks. I don't want to be a drill Sergent but I don't want to be a door mat either. I have tried different approaches but nothing seems to get through. Everyone is in their own world and I am here to clean it up. I would stop but then it just makes it worse on me in the long run. So I guess I will stay dizzily insane chasing my tail.

Winds of change???? I think not

I hope and I pray that things have changed. I get it right in my face that things are exactly the same as they were 5 months ago. I want the best for you but its seems you want the best from others. If I even seen a slight glimmer of change I could have a chance of believing, but there hasn't been a glimmer. Same things are going on day after day. I will not be put through this again nor will I put my family, which you are suppose to be a part of, through this again. Your days are numbered. Figure out what it means to be a useful part of this family. Do for the family in this home what you did for others in their homes. I don't see how you can help others but pretty much tell us F off! I don't want to go back to the way things were but I will if I have to for the best of the family unit.

What is wrong with kids today?

I remember growing up if you got in trouble the neighbor would grab you up swat your butt and take you to your parents and you got a spanking. I don't fear my parents I respect them. If parents were allowed to be parents and do what is right for their child we wouldn't have half the hoodlums we do now. The state needs to back off. They need to worry about the kids not being watched by an adult, going with out food and other basic needs. The kids that are being abused are getting over looked. Kids know now a days they call CPS, child protective services, and say my parents are abusing me and they get picked up. Even though the "abuse" is they were told to clean room or had game system taken away or even to eat their veggies.
A spanking and I mean just a spanking on the butt will show them that they can not act in the manner they have been. Time out work for some kids but not all. Its finding what works for your child. Be the parent don't let your child rule you. It takes time and effort but so does raising a respectful well rounded child.

What if it was your family?

Our government is putting people's lives on the line by holding out funds that they have worked for and are still working for. There are millions of people that depend on their social security payments because that is their only income. After working for years putting money into social security and 401K funds they now are out of their retirement money(401K) and may not get their social security payments. If our elected officials had to live like this things would be SO very different. Would they allow their parents or other loved ones be in this position? I think not.
Why are we still paying past office holders? I don't get paid for jobs I am no longer working! I had to provide my own car and insurance and fuel, they don't. How does any of this make sense? It doesn't! This country waste more money on useless things. How can you expect soldiers to fight for their country when their country isn't willing to take care of them and their families? No one want to work for free but our government is asking our soldiers to do this. How about our elected officials, past and present, give up their pay and perks to pay our soldiers and our elderly?
Ask them this question "What if it was your family?"